I'm pants shitting drunk right now
just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
Guess who's still drunk but on time to court to represent a DUI?
You are my hero
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
You peed on a flamingo?!?
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
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