wake up i wanna do it froggy style
Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
Reminder to self: never have sex on a trampoline. Trampoline burn hurts worse than carpet burn.
Randomize