I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
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