But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
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