before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
Randomize
