He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
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