It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
Randomize
