I'm laying in your front yard are you home
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
How drunk was I last night?
You tried to unlock a door with your dick. That drunk.
Not the explanation for the cock bruise that I was looking for.
Randomize
