no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
I'm sorry I kept calling last night when you wouldn't pick up. I'm REALLY sorry I sang "You Oughta Know" on more than 4 voice mails.
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
Last time i carry you out of a forest
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
Randomize
