glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You don't have a penis so I'm not texting you at this hour. This is penis texting hour only.
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
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