me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
Randomize
