I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
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