Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
