I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
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