Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
She announced her abortion via fbk
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
I woke up after 12 hours of being wildly intoxicated, got jizz on my face, and woke up in a different bed than I passed out in. My makeup is still perfect. I'm writing Revlon a thank you note.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
