Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
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