I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
There's a naked man in my car right now.
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
Randomize
