dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
Listening to my boss get blown in the next room by a male bartender from the gay bar. And watching pawnstars. Tell me I'm not the best wingman ever.
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
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