When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
Reggie can tackle my bush.
Nothing says "get your life together" better than waking up in a tub full of your own vomit. Twice. In one night.
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
I deserve to be covered in dicks
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
Randomize
