Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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