I can't believe the cop was so cool about the whole thing, I mean, I had man mayo all over my jeans.
It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
Randomize
