And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
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