so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
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I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
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