what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
Just saw a guy at the gas station legitimately dressed in exactly what my costume was last night. Fuck his life.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
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