4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
The beers last night were like the tears from god
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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