just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
Operation Purity has been aborted
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
The girl at the liquor store remembered me as "the girl who pays in hundreds" so she didn't ID me
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
Randomize