Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
I was at circle k buying gas and this girl in a papa johns uniform comes up and is like " I've got a bunch of extra pizzas. Large peperoni for $5." then she went to her trunk and pulled one out. It felt like a drug deal for a fat person
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
Randomize