The maid of honor just puked.
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
Randomize
