I swear she didn't look like that last week.
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
Randomize
