Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
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