Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
Randomize
