My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
I was not drunk enough for that final.
We were drunk at 3am with no food. I sent him to the lobby with ninety cents for like a bag of chips and I swear on my life he came back with a meatball sub
...did you ask him where he got a meatball sub at 3:00am?
He just kept mumbling something about being a hunter/gatherer
Oh AND he got us two bags of chips.
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
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