she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
Sometimes I feel like I should become a beautician purely for my ability to shave pretty shapes into my pubic hair.
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
He was having this drunk emotional breakdown and I was just trying to cheer him up but instead fell and dumped the whole pickle jar on me
It was cool though because he was fine afterwards and somehow I convinced them I did it on purpose...
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
Randomize
