even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mom, I'm really sorry you saw my naked ex-boyfriend in the living room this morning. I can explain....but I'd rather just stick with this apology and be done with it
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
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