i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize
