hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
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