so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
Adding to the list of things I have said out loud at the bar that I shouldn't have: "I am the yoda of sucking dick"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
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