I know i'm drunk when the "men" sign on the bathroom sounds chinese
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
You've changed since you got that strap on
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
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