Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
It's not a walk of shame if you run
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
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