I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
why are our drunk alter egos so much more successful than us?
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
Remember that St. Patrick's Day when I fucked your married coworker in his truck and the whole bar was chanting for you "Don't fuck Mike"?! #TheLuckOfTheIrish 🍀
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
