I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
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