He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
pop tarts are not kleenex
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
Randomize