my grandma just informed me that patrick swayze used to babysit my dads cousins why wasn't i informed of this early...like when i was obsessed with dirty dancing!
I'm pissed I'm finding this out at 24 bc i could have used this material to make friends
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
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