FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
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