We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
I told my boyfriend my favorite food was strawberry poptarts, now my email inbox is getting spammed with nude pics of him with his dick in a poptart box..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
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