About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
Randomize
