I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
Just thought of the perfect gift for mom.... how about not telling her about my fourth open intoxicant ticket I got last night?
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
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