Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
Dude, this chick just tossed my salad hard. All that I could picture was a dog trying to get the last of the peanut butter out of the jar of Jiff and trying not to think of how grotesque my last dump was.
Then she tried to kiss me and I wouldn't and she got pissed off and went to sleep. Then about an hour later, her kid called her. She went home and on the way out I told her to wash her mouth before she kissed her kid good night. Weird night..
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day.
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
Randomize
