i'm signing you up for texting rehab
with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
Randomize
