And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
Randomize
