Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
Randomize
