I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
Really need a jack off emoji
Who do we write to about that?
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
Randomize
